Monday, November 13, 2006
First thing first, dunno if you will read this or not, but i sincerely apologize on what i comment on the girl you like. i am reflecting. However, i also wan to tell u that, actually i have totally nothing against her...it was kind of because of you, thats why i sort of went off track in criticising.
If you think its kid's stuff then dun read on cos i am just gonna grumble about my part.
One thing, i am kind of sian when u tell me abt ur forever-seem-like-no-result r/s. Yes yes i understand u like to take it slow...but i always get mixed up. You always sound to me like u very not confirm, then asked me how she think...like gan jiong about it, but in the final end after all the advice and opinions i gave, u told me u also would like to go slow and u have other things u worry about. What u trying to show me? i dun really understand. If u just wan a listening ear tell me and i can shut my foul mouth up and be a good listener. Cos i always think u contradicting yourself, thats y i got sian. Since u okie with waiting, whats the problem?
Another point, i know this is a really nice girl and you are really good to her...and the situation is diff from ur previous r/s...but...forgive me...u repeat quite a few times le...its nothing special that a guy go after a girl ba?
Also, i know u got pissed with me somehow cos of my foul mouth(i admit la) and remind me u always patiently listening to me without bombarding me back. I know de, i know u are not petty. But one thing i wan u to know also. Do u know there are also times when i felt humiliated and yet i didnt voice out cos i dun wanna spoil the friendship between us? Due to ur constant reminder, i am reminded for a few times how childish i am supposed to be. I know u got ur serious side and fun side, but can dun emphasize to me that towards me and my friend then u might seem fun but towards others u can be very serious? In this way i really felt stupid, like i have no brains to communicate with u on serious matter. Once is okie, but the second and third reminder really puts me off. We only have an age gap of a few years...i know u r mature, but can dun always treat us like xiao mei mei?For u u think its nothing, but for us we feel like shit -filled-brains.
And i know my limits when i am at work. I dun deny i am still immature, but its only towards some i show my temper, so even if i might have mislead u with my shitty attitude, i am not like that in work. I am young, but i am not that ignorant.
I enjoyed times when u shared with me things abt sch and work, cos i felt appreciated, i felt like i am on par with u,that i am a friend, not some kids. If u think u are always fair, pls be fair in this sense too.
Okie, let out le, felt much better. Good luck for exams people=D
--Mary HAD a little lamb--
9:14 PM
