i am still stressed at work. No one bullied me, there was no politics (for my case at least)...but i just felt i am unable to handle a lot of things by myself. With pei^2 resigning...everyone else is stressed about their own workload, yet i cant be independent enough. Sometimes, comments are just too demoralizing.

Money is forever the issue i am worried about. Without it i cant do anything. Everything is like so unsettled for me. I dun have a goal.

Now i understand the meaning behind the song of SHE 不想长大. It truly sucks. Putting aside extreme cases, being children benefits the most. The process of growing up is sickening, especially for people who are stepping into the working society. When i was once ignorant, i always think that miracle and hopes exist. (Disclaimer:i am not mature now either. Miracle and hope can still exist)

But as i grow up, i started to give up on hoping. It really hurts, especially when in the end, it still didnt turn out the way u want it to be. According to the disclaimer, of cos i not tt mean disregard everything la..just that doesnt really work for me. It is just like, when we used to be very young, we (i supposed) believe that one day we will find the prince charming coming, or something around there. But the truth is of course no such person la.. even prince charming can also be an asshole at times. This is one simple example of things arent really as pretty as we thought.

And thats what i am experiencing now.